[8/11/11 12:38:14 AM] Parker Shepherd: There is a notable quotation that has been circulating throughout social culture which, as I recall, is most commonly worded “there is a fine line between genius and insanity”.
[8/11/11 12:39:18 AM] Parker Shepherd: As to how long I will last talking like this, I request that you specify whether you are more interested in how long I am capable of talking like this, or if the answer to how long I am going to chose to respond in this manner is of more pertinence to you.

[8/11/11 12:42:01 AM] Parker Shepherd: Im sorry if this alters your perception of the past, but I can only scarcely recall an instance in which you proofread copy that had been written by me. The vast majority of your efforts of scrutiny have been applied toward the work of others, having their work displayed onto of a larger framework of which I myself had been responsible for.
[8/11/11 12:44:19 AM] Parker Shepherd: I have never made an attempt to discern my own limits for such intellectual conversation, but I am fairly confident that with the continued application of such language skills, my ability to continue as such would undoubtedly increase rather than decline; that is to say I would likely be able to sustain this mode of speech indefinitely.
[8/11/11 12:46:37 AM] Parker Shepherd: For the matter of when I will cease to conduct myself in this manner, I can assure you that it will be no sooner than the specified time tomorrow early in the day, however, as you do not respond in kind, the benefit of constructing such responses is particularly low, despite the satisfaction of reassuring myself that lack of closeness to a large number of intellectuals has not stunted my capabilities for proper language development.
[8/11/11 12:48:04 AM] Parker Shepherd: I would like to mention, however, that given proper reinforcement, I could, and very may will continue after this method for the duration of at least a few hours after the pre-arranged completion schedule, noting that this statement comes with no inherent guarantee of any sort

[8/11/11 12:52:53 AM] Parker Shepherd: Are you finding your mental capacity for logical reasoning decreasing in an inverse proportion to the number of hours since you first awakened this morning? I had been under the impression that rigorous classwork throughout your high school career had conditioned you to become fully functional if not placed in a state of higher level functioning on considerably less quantity of both deep-cycle and R.E.M. sleep.

[8/11/11 12:55:51 AM] Parker Shepherd: If I may query you, what would be your opinion on the notion of my developing this form of speech into my work throughout the writing class that I have been registered for this coming fall semester? Do you think that it would be more likely to be of annoyance or would it be an optimal way to display my capabilities to the instructor, thereby gaining approval?

[8/11/11 1:00:04 AM] Parker Shepherd: Regardless of what graduate students may place judgement on, I feel that cultivating this skill set may yield great benefit when the time comes that I am required to formulate a thesis paper. I propose that at a minimum, from time to time we reinstate this challenge for a specified amount of time, and I further would like to make it known that I have never made a formal attempt at continuing this general theme of sentence structure through verbal communication.

[8/11/11 1:02:32 AM] Parker Shepherd: Based on the number of corrections thus far, and the fact that the only one you have mentioned was a small punctuation error due to a software keyboard and slight lack of attention, if I keep this skill in reasonable condition, I may be capable of writing a thesis paper with little or no revisiting past it’s initial rough draft.
[8/11/11 1:03:47 AM] Parker Shepherd: I have never communicated in such a manner for more than approximately a single paragraph with anyone else on this planet due to the mentioned lack of closeness to individuals I would consider to be intellectual; you are one of the few people I know capable of comprehending me when I speak similarly to how I currently am.

[8/11/11 1:06:52 AM] Parker Shepherd: Have you had a realization that in fact that could be one of the various purposes of developing my ability to communicate verbally in this manner? It may be a valuable skill to become proficient in appearing vastly more intelligent than previously thought in a situation where dominance would be beneficial to establish.

[8/11/11 1:09:53 AM] Parker Shepherd: I think that could be due to relative plasticity of the brain and it’s capability of accommodation of a repeated process that it is required to make use of. Through repeated stimulation of the appropriate centers of the brain, I may be reinforcing neural pathways that in turn lead to increased comprehension through continued conversation.

[8/11/11 1:13:37 AM] Parker Shepherd: I have made minor efforts to maintain the approximate reading level necessary to reconstruct my general original thought process throughout the length of our communications, and I have suddenly developed a curiosity for your perception of my success at these efforts.

[8/11/11 1:17:46 AM] Parker Shepherd: I have never applied myself in this manner for more than a paragraph or so, as I stated previously. I acknowledge that I desperately need friends that are on the same approximate level of intellectuality, and also, I feel that I can further develop my intellectual capability. I also think that through consisten mental effort, I may also be able to increase my intelligence quotient to as much as ten to twenty points by my best judgement.

[8/11/11 1:19:47 AM] Parker Shepherd: I also would like to state that although I am moderately applying proper sentence structure and making attempts at avoiding the most mundane of words, I feel that my vocabulary is actually lacking somewhat due to my menal qmenialin which I glaze over unfamiliar words when read filling in their contextual meaning almost instantaneously due to my highly convergent thought process.
[8/11/11 1:23:20 AM] Parker Shepherd: I also question how I am considerably tolerant of people who when faced with such replies would not even dare start reading let alone challenge themselves to the task of deconstructing my messages. I admit that they frustrate me deeply, and I long for people I can properly converse with on a frequent basis, but I have found positive qualities in them. Largely that they induce a seratonin release in my central nervous system either due to activities they participate in, or the more carnal fact that there is a seratonin increase due to the physically pleasing nature that they present, and in some cases, moderate hormone level modifications.

[8/11/11 1:25:29 AM] Parker Shepherd: Although intelligence quotient tests are not considered perfectly accurate, they do place a measurable approximate value of general intelligence that can be used to reference one’s self relative to others who have taken the same test, and I feel that the chances of finding someone who would enjoy such conversations, let alone someone capable of understanding them would be significantly higher if that person were to have a smiler smilerigence quotient to mine.

[8/11/11 1:26:59 AM] Parker Shepherd: In truth, I do not feel that I can name any individual with whom I have spoken to in this manner, but felt less confident in stating that I had never made the attempt before. I may have participated in a much shorter format of this type of conversation with an individual such as Will Morris or perhaps a girl or two who seemed interested in me talking properly for short periods of time.

[8/11/11 1:28:04 AM] Parker Shepherd: That is correct, but another thing to realize is that intelligence quotient tests are only designed to measure convergent thinking. That is only one part of mental health, although for me, a somewhat relevant one.
[8/11/11 1:28:47 AM] Parker Shepherd: I do specifically recall that there was a moderate gap in mine and your scores on that particular test.
[8/11/11 1:30:22 AM] Parker Shepherd: If I may submit another query, you mentioned that my responses tonight were “amazing” you. I am curious as to whether or not you expected me to be able to function at this level for sustained periods of time, let alone indefinitely, or if you thought that it was merely a stunt that required a large amount of concentration on my part.
[8/11/11 1:31:20 AM] Parker Shepherd: If you would enlighten me as to your honest thoughts, it would contribute greatly to my knowledge of how I am perceived in the world and would benefit my understanding of human nature more than you might think.

[8/11/11 1:32:47 AM] Parker Shepherd: I foresaw that you might be inclined to phrase your answer to be more optimistic of me that you may truly have thought, I was attempting to encourage you to state it as you saw it, no matter if you thought it would be “offensive”.

[8/11/11 1:33:38 AM] Parker Shepherd: Due to the fact that I have almost never spoken like this, ever, it is conceivable that you thought that my mind would not be accustomed to this method of communication adeptly.

[8/11/11 1:35:04 AM] Parker Shepherd: I only assumed the possibility due to the above mentioned reasoning. I actually generally have come to believe that you hold me in particularly high regard, despite your sarcastic nature and lack of quantity of compliments in an outward direction.

With the caption: “Which, at one point, led to a study showing that LSD produces no more hallucinations as placebo”

<jeebus> the “bishop” came to our church today

<jeebus> he was a flippin impostor

<jeebus> never once moved diagonally